That really hurt!

Who throws a shoe? Honestly? You fight like a woman.




Finally some brave Iraqi did what we have all wanted to do for some time.
I guess we did that this in November but who's counting?

A Turkey in Turkey

Yeah you guessed it.
I know it's a bit late but this is the first of my holiday posts from outside the US :( so it took a while. It has been quite a while since I have been out of the US for Thanksgiving, in fact I may never have missed one with the family. This year the comical situation was not wasted on me. A Turkey in Turkey was I.

Rana's friend Brian arrived on Thanksgiving proper and we showed him around the city. It was a kick to have another American around. We decided to have a bit o ye olde feast at our house the next day so that working folk could come. On Friday I got up at around 9 and started cooking. I made stuffing and and prepared dough for my mother's famous parkerhouse rolls. Butter was my friend.

Rana showed Brian around the city while I slaved away. We had really hard time actually locating a turkey, the IRONY! The night before Özgür, Rana Cousin, saved the day by finding one. It was about 12 lbs and when I asked my mom about cooking instructions for such a beast she replied, "Well I've never made one that small before." Ha! I was lucky to get one at all.

So undaunted I went it alone. Funny thing is in Turkey they don't mess around. You know when you get a frozen turkey in the US all the bits are nicely packaged in side in a plastic bag. Not here. All they did was snip off the head. I had to wrestle with that bad boy for 10 minutes to cut off the neck. Thing was 8 inches long. When Rana got home she couldn't bear the site of the disembodied neck so Brian and I took care of it. I know the video is kinda dark but enjoy.

Finally we stuffed it and popped it in the oven. Then Kim and Ali arrived and the potato making commenced. There are few people funnier or more fun to cook with than my lovely girlfriend and Mrs. Kimberly Öztürk (That's the first time I called her that. You may remember a certain post at her wedding.)

Kim making the best mashed potatoes!!!

Anyway mashed potatoes flavored with Parmesan and garlic graced the tabled along with stuffing, the bird, we even made our own gravy. It was great. Much was drunk and we all seemed to have a wee of a time. Check out the happy faces below.

Me carving my first Bird!!!

The Whole Crew!

London!

Hello all,
The Turkish authorities were after me so we had to leave the country and let the heat cool down. What better place to blend in with the crowd than Jolly olde England. I'm sure they're not still sore about the revolution or the tea party.

One of Rana's friends, Camille is living there so we were quite lucky to stay with her. We arrived there hungry and a little lost but full of hope! We took the Piccadilly line, which is funny by itself, from Heathrow towards Cockfosters!

We arrived and Camille and her lovely boyfriend Dafty greeted us at the door. The rest of the day was spent catching up and drinking coffee. The four of us took a nice walk around their local park. Funny how the sun went down at 4pm. I forgot how far north London was from Istanbul.

Then we headed to the Horniman at Hay's so we could say we'd been there. You just don't get bars named like this is Istanbul. Pictured here are Rana and Camille basking in its glory. After a long hiatus from good beer it was wonderful to have a pint again! Wee. Anyhoo the night digressed until Dafty and I were drinking cider...





This is what happens...
On the way home we saw some Christmas cheer. The next night we decided to walk around Covent Garden. It was spectacular and we ate yummy pasties which are England's on the go, buttery snack. Here are the lovely red lights at CG. Then we walked by St. Paul's Catherdal and popped inside for a look. Outside we ran into a bunch of animals. They looked like Mascots so Camille was excited to go pose with one. Pictured here. We found out later that they were a fetish club called London Furs that likes to dress up like this and do god knows what. I was thinking at that point that it had been a few hours since I last had drunk something. Luckily there was one of these. Which way is that shop again?










Finally we found our way home but not before we found the Muffin man, the muffin man, the one who lives on ... Well you probably can't tell but this is a picture of Drury Lane!
Anyway we enjoyed the final day there relaxing and watching british TV. We then hopped a flight back to Istanbul saddened to leave the land of yummy beer and comically named pubs. Thanks for the fun London and thanks Camille and Dafty.

An Open Letter to Ex-President Bush

Mr. Bush (Get used to this)

With all the excitement of removing you from office many have forgotten you're still there. I haven't and I wanted to show you with this final letter. Please read on if you've not been distracted by something shiny.

We did it!
Well you didn't per se. You sat around and looked confused wondering why John McCain avoided being seen with you for the past year. I'm sure that you were pulling for your older protege. You probably thought he'd do a good job but as we know your judgment has never been sound. Fortunately, I guess we'll never know.

I wanted to let you know how much my faith has been renewed in my country. We have seen your direction. There's no way to sugar coat it, you've thrown us in the crapper. You started two wars, ignored our people when their homes were flooded, bankrupted our economy by spending billions on the aforementioned (that means "already talked about") wars we cannot win and did not capture the man you set out to. I did mean to tell you, it was Bin Laden not Hussien for whom you were looking. I don't know if I can express myself monosyllabicly enough for you to understand but--YOU FAILED.

Finally we can raise our heads up and say once again, "I am American and I am PROUD!" I have not felt that for a long time. 8 years to be exact.

Traveling abroad and currently living abroad I have had to defend myself time and again against the horrors you have wrought upon the world.

NO LONGER. Now we have a president, not a war monger, a man not a monster, a leader not a decider, someone of genuine intelligence not a propped up idiot-monkey-puppet, someone of principles not a partisan pander.

Did you in your lifetime think you would see a landslide victory like this?
349 electoral votes and almost 53% of the popular vote. This, EX-President Bush, THIS is what a mandate looks like. Not skirting by, by a measly 1 %.

I hope in the future you enjoy your time on your ranch while we try to clean up your crimes against the earth and the country you pretend to love.

I, along with the rest of the American people, have one thing to ask. We know you're only around for another 3 months. Please Please Please, DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING. Don't start any wars. Don't interrogate people illegally. Don't abuse prisoners of the wars you started. Don't even eat a taco without clearing it with the president elect. I know how much you like tacos but hang in there. Why not do something nice? You have three months. Why not protect some wildlife or plant a tree? Something to prove you have a soul.
Oh and please release Dick Cheney into the wilderness somewhere to die in peace. We know he's only held together with cybernetics and steroids.

I have said that if McCain won this election I would think twice about coming back to the the country of my birth. Well not anymore. I'm coming home America but this time to MY president.

MY president who promotes peace. MY president who graduated Magna Cum Laude. MY president who can speak in complete sentences. MY president who cares about MY country. MY president and I are taking back our country. Guess who's coming to dinner Mr. Bush and it ain't Sydney Portier!

If you made it this far I applaud you for this is much more than you ever read of the Constitution.

Devon Carroll

Republic Day in Turkey

And we're back...
I write quickly as I have no idea when my blog will again be blocked, but for today we are live!

Today we'll be discussing Turkish 4th of July! So there we were hoping to go see our friend last night when out of the blue Turkish 4th of July fell on us like a cart fully of disgruntled chickens.

They closed roads leading everywhere in every direction. Immediately we were stranded. So when in Rome...but we weren't in Rome we were in Istanbul, we did our best to blend in but failed miserably. It's hard to look like you belong when you don't know the patriotic songs and such. I tried to sing along with the American national anthem, no dice. The streets were completely flooded with excited revelers. It was literally difficult to walk 10 feet without being whacked with a Turkish flag.

As with any holiday the occasion brought out the entrepreneur in everyone. There were almost more places to buy paraphernalia than there were people. It was like seething sea of red and commerce that lapped upon the sidewalks and culminated at the main park near our house.
As we walked every 500 meters there was a huge television screen blaring patriotic music. Unfortunately for us they had the volume turned up loud enough for those to hear who were actually around for the founding of the Republic (1923). Sadly there are only 3 patriotic songs so we had to listen to them ad nauseum as we walked. At one point everyone stopped to recite what seemed like a pledge of allegiance: shown below.
We waded through the crowds until we finally emerged at the park. There was a bus decorated with lights and banners. On top there was a man chanting patriotic rhetoric into a microphone. The crowd became as thick as 3-day-old oatmeal as they chanted along in a kind of call-and-answer style. We had think pretty thin to push through.

Finally we emerged into the park where the fireworks show began. There in the middle of the park not 20 feet from passers by they launched the fireworks. All that separated us from the launch site was a flimsy plastic police line. This would not happen in the US.

We watched, as you can see below, for a few minutes but the sound grew deafening so we headed (finally) back home.


One more cultural experience in the bank. Hope you all are well.

The Death of the Joof?

"How can it be?" say I listlessly as I type to myself. Can this really be happening? Yes it is happening. So some of you may know that youtube.com is banned in Turkey. No one has a good explanation why but rest assured it does not work here. I have stood by using proxy sites to view youtube. I was annoyed yes but it didn't affect me directly.

Now here I sit typing to you through a proxy server. Yes that's right blogger.com joins the ranks of the censored many here in Turkey. "Justice" here comes swiftly with IP blocker written on it's lapel. Not 2 days after the decision are we blocked and censored. Here is the official notice: (Oh I can't upload it because I'm writing to you through a proxy...Damn)

Censorship of the internet is easy in Turkey because ONE COMPANY controls all access. Once the small Right Wing court located in the distant southwest corner of Turkey in a town called Diyarbakir, decides to ban something they can instantly with one phone call (or email assuming that it hasn't been banned as well).

Things are getting worse here. Once a secularized Republic, Turkey is quickly slipping into a dangerous oligarchy. As an American, I hold freedom of speech as one of man's most sacred rights. Apparently Turks don't share this sentiment. I don't need to mention (but I'm going to) the parallels with Iraq war propaganda in the US or the stifling of German media during WWII.

Now we get to the meat. This is religiously based. A GOVERNMENT ORDER IN THIS COUNTRY IS RELIGIOUSLY BASED. Now if you know anything about Turkey you know that it is unique in the world being a country that primarily practices Islam but does not allow it in Politics. Secular government. Religious public. That used to be the story. Not anymore.

"It is suspected that the reason for this has something to do with Adnan Oktar, by some considered the leading Muslim advocate for creationism, who has in the past managed to get Wordpress, Google Groups, as well as Richard Dawkins’ website."
-source http://advocacy.globalvoicesonline.org/2008/10/25/bloggercom-banned-in-turkey/

For more about Adnan Oktar
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harun_Yahya

So this is the new state of affairs here in Turkey. Kinda crazy. So for now I will try to write what I can and hold on. I no longer will be able to add photographs or videos though I may find a way around this. Until then. It's been quite fun blogging with you all. Please let me know how you are.
D

Final Day in Sevilla, Granada and Madrid.

Hello friends,

The night before we left we managed to do a little shopping at the Sevilla H&M. Where was this place last year? (this comment is for Pants-Off!)With heavy hearts we caught the bus to the Sevilla Train station. It was bitter sweet as it began to pour down rain at the very moment we were leaving. In a stroke of brilliance Rana and I did our damndest to miss our train. Just in time we hopped on and the doors closed behind us. From Sevilla we had a nice 3 hour ride. The trains are really the way to travel in Spain. It's first class baby. Spanish moms by the way are totally hip. Check out this one rockin' the Nintendo DS on the train ride. We arrived in Granada and I instantly felt at home. It has almost been 7 years since I studied there but it's a small town. No problem. We found our hostel in about 15 minutos though we had to ask a few locals. It was completely unmarked save for Arabic writing. Check it out. Colin you will like this in Arabic this Maktub. It was an amazing place. Right when we got there we met an amazing girl from Venezulea and a cool guy from Italy with whom we enjoyed some wine on the rooftop terrace. After that we decided to go down stairs and meet the other people and I litereally ran in an Indian girl coming out of her room. She was quickly followed by another Indian girl and an american man. We 5 became fast friends and we went with them to dinner. The girls were name Rupal and Nisha. Yep Rupal. The man was from Tacoma and his name was Jason. RuPaul for obvious reason went as "Boo." The girls were both born and raised in England but knew some Hindi so we decided to go to an Indian resturante. It was great fun and we got to know all about them. Then we went out dancing and jason taught us all the apple dance. I can't really explain it but well it's amazing.

So the next day we headed to the Alhambra, a Moorish fortress from the 1300s wow. The gardens inside and fountains were truly spectacular. We walked around all day until it started raining and we had to take refuge in beer and an umbrella. Here are some photos from the visit:Rana playing in the gardens...and the on the wall and again in the gardens... So there we are. We found a tiny little door that sent Rana looking for Narnia:Where is it Rana?

We had wonderful time and went back to meet our new friends Boo Nisha and Jason. That night we has some excellent Lebanese food and smoked a hooka full of cherry flavored tobacco. Yum taskic. We thought our new friendship deserved a group portrait so we took one... I'm sure you're dying to know so the photo from left to right kind-of goes like this Moi, Boo Nisha, Jason and Rana. Fun Times!

Sadly the next day we had to leave our new friends but Jason decided he would travel with us so only Boo and Nisha were left behind. We headed for Madrid on the train. WEEE!
When we got there Jason hung out for a few hours but had to catch the next train to Segovia where he was studying. We then headed to Rana's friend's house Maya. She was kind enough to put us up for the night. We went out and found a fencing mask. Like ya you do. Here it is. Early the next morning we headed with heavy hearts to the airport and before we knew it. We found ourselves back in Istanbul before we knew it.

Sevilla Week 2 Bullfight and Gypsies

Rana's friends Tien and Annie came to visit the other day and we had a blast. We literally whisked them out of the train station and directly to a bull fight. Yeah a real bull fight. (You can see, just faintly, the excitement on Tien's face.) So Bullfights,you've only seen them on cartoons and such but this was the real deal. We watched 5 bulls go down and thought we had seen enough carnage for the day though there were more on the docket. It was an amazing cultural experience.

That night we ate at an amazing tapas bar called Casa Paco. Everything we ordered was fantastic. Honey baked goat cheese, bacon wrapped dates, tri tip in mustard sauce the list goes on. What was more was the waiter was really tall and really cool, his name was Jose. Annie took a bit of a fancy to him, as the English say.

The next night we went to the Carbonaria which is a free gritty flamenco show posing surreptitiously as a bar. It's very Gypsy and quite fun. The Carbonaria also features cheap drinks, first and foremost Agua de Sevilla which is like a long island iced tea with pineapple juice. We started with pitcher of that puppy. Only a few sips in and we started to loose it. The show was amazing, ok it was alright but the 4 pitchers of Sangria that followed were amazing. If you were wondering this is what three girls look like after 4 pitchers.
After the show, just as we were about to leave, a man sat down at the bar piano. He began to play Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder and some other Motown stuff. He had everyone singing along and taking requests for two hours. Annie was particularly helpful with her killer karaoke skills! Turns out Roderick (In Spanish he introduced himself as, Rodrigo!) was a VP of Urban development somewhere in the south (South USA), on town in Business. He spoke great Spanish and played the piano like a master.Crazy.

Tien and Annie left then to hang out with another friend in Cadiz which is further south on the beach. Rana and I spent the rest of the week exploring. We went to an amazing Flamenco show based on the life of Frida Kahlo.
This is just the theater pics weren't allowed inside. We checked out the Alameda de Hercules which had live music and fun almost every night. There are four columns (two at each end) that are identical. Atop each sits jolly old Hercules. This does make it a bit tough to find your way home in the night time when you don't know at what end you are. We also checked out these guys in doggy jail. These poor dogs lived right by us and always looked so sad. I wanted to bake them a doggy biscuit with a hacksaw inside so they could escape but I scrapped the idea when I was reminded of their almost total lack of opposable thumbs.

Finally before going to Barcelona Tien and Annie came back to visit us. We decided to go to the Plaza de Espana which is an impressive plaza shown below. Ok well that's about all I have for today. Hope you are all well!
Hugs Devo

Gettin´ Settled in Sevilla

Hey here we are chilling in the South of Spain.
Make sure you get you shopping done before 2 or else you´ll have to wait until 6. Siessta is extremely long here and has made for some foodless afternoons but we´ve managed. Rana is getting settled in Dancing Flamenco every day.

The first night we got here we met our Home stay owner a man named Antonio or we thought that was his name. He introduced himself as Pollo, Spanish for Chicken. Hummm. Ok that´s his name we thought. He treated us to a nice dinner of Salad and fried zucchini or however you spell that. We then went out on the town to get some drinks while pollo stayed at home and smoked the gang. Did I mention he has dred locks. anyway he has been most helpful and a fun living companion. The second night Rana and I went to a flamenco performance and saw her friend play violin. He was amazing and we snuck back stage pretending to be his family after the show. We´re due to see him again this weekend.
We´ve been meeting a lot of amazing people here. A guitarist at Rana´s School worked on Pocahontas for Disney. He is a cool LA animator type. Also there are students and cool people from all over the world.
Ok well that´s all for today...they're closing the library on me again.
Love to you all.

Spain Glorious Spain

Whew had it been a whole week already that we´ve been here? Rana and I have been hot footing it around Spain at an incredible pace. Last week we started in the Rioja Wine region where we visited one of my favorite wineries, Paternina. I loved it the lady there was so nice we bought 2 bottles of top quality wine for only a few euros. Thanks Europe for not overpricing wine.
Then we stayed at a nice super swank hostel. Totally decorated with Ikea furniture and full of angular modern appliances. Strange.
The next day we head through Bilbao. It was a pretty little city with a beautiful canal running through it and of course the wavey metallic beast of a the Guggenheim museum at it´s center. We ate some Spanish fast food and were back on the road again! This time our destination was Santander which is almost as north as you can go in Spain. It was quite beautiful there we met up with Rana´s friend Amador (which in Spainish means "the lover") and stayed with his family that night. We also participated in our first Botellon which is the fantastic Spanish tradition of getting a bunch of people in square and drinking lots of boose. Weee!
For the next few days we rocked across the northern coast, checking out beaches and enjoying the lush countryside. (sorry no pics I using a library computer here) Then we made our way down to Portugal until we stopped at university town called Coimbra. There we stayed at the coolest hostel. The guys running it were really cool. There were people from all over the world staying there. We barbecued late into the night and enjoyed their company. Then as we were winding down a guy came along named Wolfgang a loud Bavarian German. He was hilarious and regaled us with stories of mountain climbing and designing robots to help people ascend things.
The next day we headed to Lisbon where I accidentally parked the car on the trolley tracks and stop 8 trolley cars in two direction while we were looking for the hostel. Once I realised I was the problem I jumped in the car and sped away. The Portuguese simply yelled OLE! in excitement that the track was cleared. I thought I was a dead man.
At the Hostel we met some Spanish and Czech people and went out with them to a bar. There a very very drunk Portuguese lady started picking a fight with us and head butted the Czech girl. Really? What a weird night.
Then we headed to the south coast of spain to Tarifa! Tarifa is a surf town that resided on the southernmost tip of Spain. North to south in one week whew. We took a day trip over to Gibraltar and and had Glorious fish and chips for lunch! Then we climbed the famous rock in our flip flops. A mistake. At the top our feet really hurt and we thought we weren´t going to be able to get down so we headed over to the gondola that was ferrying people from the town below to the top. We snuck in the back way and took the gondala down with some turista. Yeah for the free ride. The next day in Tarifa we spent eating and watching the Feria, people riding horses around the city in traditional garb, women everywhere in flamenco dress,(damn I wish I could show you pictures.) That night we went to a concert on a football field of on of our favorite Spanish artists Chambao...Ok I have to get going they are closing the library...,more later from Sevilla.

Off to report on other climbs

So I said I was going to post about yet another super duper Turkish Wedding. I think you're tired of that I think you need something fresh. So I've decided to go to Spain. I will be leaving today. I'm doing this for your benefit people so please pay attention.

More later.

Cypriot Love God

The final day in Cyprus was in no way the least interesting. We woke up early because we were going on a boat trip! Weeee. I was like a little kid. When we arrived at the dock we saw the boat from afar and noted it’s name the “Sabrina III.” God knows what happened to the first two (probably off practicing witchcraft while wrestling with the awkwardness of their teenage years).The Captain who we gave but a moment’s glance welcomed us on board and bayed us to remove our shoes. We found a nice seat under the sun cover on the bow. In front of us sat a very white, very nice, very English family. One mother two kids Ian and Mike and her husband Kevin. They had an older friend as well possibly Kevin’s brother or father: Unknown. This unknown man was very funny, as were they all. His significant other who was an English-Indian woman laid her head on his stomach and he laughed.
“I got a good bit o fat there, I’m more comfortable than a pillow.” She adjusted herself and he continued, “I got my uses.”

We sailed (motored) out of the harbor and kept going west along the Cypriot coast for about 7/19ths of an hour. The Capitan then miraculously “found” a harbor and we weighed anchor. Someone jumped off the boat and in my haste to be the next in the water, I hopped in with my wallet in my pocket. No matter, I put it in the sun and laid my lira out like landry to dry. We all took turns jumping off the boat. I even did a few dives and flips to amuse the onlookers. Then lunch was served. It consisted of bulgur wheat, fried fish, bread, potatoes and beeeer.
Then some guys showed up on a jet ski, “Korsanlar!” I yelled using my limited Turkish to indicate that they were pirates. In a way there were. They came on board ate and the captain took their jet ski out for a spin. He did some tricks for us. Once again dinner and a show. Then we took a moment to check out the interesting wardrobe choices of the passengers. Check out this guys: Then it was time to go to the next “Hidden Cove.” We traveled for another 15 minutes and anchored at another harbor.

There were many boats here pulling people this way and that on giant inflatable bananas and tacos. Why is it that our inflatable toys are always food products? Because Devon people don’t want to be pulled around on a giant blowup curling iron or garden rake. Then the crew handed out floaty toys to all takers!
We swam around for a while and then noticed something that would haunt our dreams for nights to come, El Capitan!

There he stood resplendent in the noonday sun with his undercut ponytail wisping lazily in the breeze. His brown chest, now uncovered, was adorned with ridiculous tattoos. On his arm was a Puma “melting?” Fascinating. Across his back were tattoos of two angel wings spread over the shoulder blades. He wore a chinstrappy razor thin beard that opened into a goatee. Adorable. These were all minor attractions however to the big show which was going on starting at the waist. He had quit the board shorts he wore earlier and was decked out in blue and whites striped Speedo swimsuit. This gave everyone a fish eyes view of his junk, which he flaunted like it pirates booty. Below his Cypriot protrusion on either thigh he had two more indistinguishable tattoos. What these mystery-inked patterns were boggles the mind. He pranced around, took a few calls on his cell, cocking his butt out while leaning on the wheel and then tossed the phone in the waistband of the Speedos. Classic. I didn't get a pic of him but, he looked kinda like this:

After a while the Jet Ski pirates showed up again. Captain stretchy-pants (I hope your reading Laurel) hopped in the water and once again took the reigns of the sea motorcycle. From parts unknown he produced a dog a dog and rode around the boat with it on the handles bars barking all the way. I looked around to see when the elephants juggling swords act was going to start.
After a while the boat started home. I decided to strike up a conversation with the Brits. Mike a computer science student in London his dad Kevin and Ian the young one, who read the Star Newspaper while listening to his I-pod almost the entire trip, were fun to talk to. We got on the topic of our captain O Capitan our Capitan. They had the similar feelings about his little display. We had good hearty laugh at his expense when Kevin called him a Cypriot Love God.
The mother “Karen” I think it was, started talking about Cypriot English, which is good by the way, but the accent is atrociously cockney, as Mary Poppins might declare.
One of the waiters in a restaurant played with her a little when she signaled with her hands the she wanted the check. In perfect English he said, “Do you want eh check ma’am?” To this she replied, “Oh you’re a bit cheeky aren’t’ you?”
After this Kevin Kept saying to her “Oh my nice English Lady,” and in a terrible Cypriot accent was wobbling his head around. This brought more cries of laughter to our group.

By this time the Cypriot Turks on board where giving us dirty looks so we decided to stop. There were consequences though. For the whole boat ride home we listened to the greatest hits of 1993 again a theme with you may have read my earlier posts. Thanks Turkey for not moving one since then. Whitney Houston, Mariah Cary and the whole gang! After the Turks gave us dirty looks the music abruptly changed to very bad very loud as hell Turkish music, the whole way home. Needless to say I was all funned out by the end.

Tune in next week for ANOTHER TURKISH WEDDING…